Doggie Report Card Day

We’ve cried, we’ve bled, we’ve lost countless hours of sleep, and we’ve cleaned every bodily function off the floor/carpet/upholstery that we can think of (and some we never thought possible), and now we’re getting even. BECAUSE…it’s Doggie Report Card Day!!!

My sister and I have had dogs in and out of our lives since infancy. We’ve seen it all, or so we believed. Now, we’re busy moms, the alpha females in our homes, and have recently welcomed new canine members into our packs. How will the new additions (Buster, Dottie, and Heidi) measure up to our “golden” standard (Rigel, a golden retriever, and the best dog we’ve ever had)?

We also have two special guest bloggers. Thanks Glenna and Rebel for your participation!

Name of Dog: Rebel

Owner: Glenna

Age as of 8/1: 7 mos

Gender: M

Breed/breed mix: “Sharpei mix” according to the shelter, other breeds we are guessing are pitbull and lab, he’s already 60 lbs!

Marking Period: Spring/Summer 2013

A – Outstanding (4.0)

B – Good (3.0)

C – Average (2.0)

D – I’m fantasizing about my dog with a new family on that hypothetical farm (1.0)

F – Honey, where's the shotgun?

N/A – Not applicable

(+/-) grades are acceptable

	GRADE
Sleep Habits
Through the night	A
Daytime naps	A
Sleep Overall Grade:	4.0
Comments: I was blessed since day one, he sleeps through the night and sleeps in if I do!
Food
Table Manners:
No Whining	B
No Stealing	C
No Begging	C
Sits still	B
Leaves people/children alone	B
Feeding:
Waits calmly	A
Eats when served	A
Doesn't inhale food like the world is about to end	D
Eats only dog food	B
Stays away from garbage/pantry/countertops/refrigerator/stove/oven	B
Food Overall Grade:	2.8
Comments: growls like a savage if you touch him while eating, one of his few flaws
Leash/Outdoor/Traveling Habits
Doesn't pull on leash	D
Walks straight	B
Heels	C
Handling distractions:
People:
Response:
Friendly but not overly	A
Non-aggressive	A
Non-fearful	A
Other dogs/animals:
Response:
Friendly but not overly	A
Non-aggressive	A
Non-fearful	A
Ignores:
Garbage	C
Scents	C
Cars	A
Inanimate objects	B
House training:
#1 outside	B
#2 outside	B
Expresses clearly the need to eliminate	D
Off Leash:
Stays near you	B
Comes when called	C
Ignores distractions	C
Car behaviour:
Calm/fear free	A
Stays in back	A
Stays still	A
Doesn’t distract driver	A
Maintains control of:
Drooling	B
Bowels	A
Urination	A
Regurgitation	B
Leash/Outdoor Habits Overall Grade:	3.14
Comments: super friendly but also has a guarding instinct. Selective hearing. Pees on the carpet occasionally still.
Personality
Friendly	A
Affectionate	A
Fun	A
Protective	A
Intelligent	A
Non-aggressive	A
Laidback	A
Submissive	B
Loyal	A
Social Skills:
With people	A
With children	A
With babies	A
With other dogs	A
With other pets	B
Play:
Enthusiastic	A
Successfully retrieves	C
Relinquishes toy without tug o’ war	D
Barking:
Stays quiet for:
Doorbell	D
Unexpected noise	D
Indoor play	B
Outdoor play	B
Stops when corrected
Doggie etiquette:
No jumping	B
No pawing/scratching	B
No leg/object/other dog humping	A
No crotch sniffing	A
Respect for:
Boundaries	C
Common commands:
Sit	A
Stay	C
Lay down	B
Come	C
Give	B
Property:
Kids’ toys	C
Electronics	C
Clothing	D
Pillows/bedding/upholstery	D
Kitchenware	C
Important paper	C
Personality Overall Grade:	2.94
Comments: super goofy and playful. Will play with any dog who wants to. Loves people and kids. Wishes the cats would play.
Mouthing
Biting:
Abstains during:
Play with adults	B
Play with children	A
Walks	A
Greetings	C
Grooming	B
Quiet time/family time	A
Chewing:
Only treats provided	D
Abstains from:
Shoes	A
Furniture	D
Mouthing Overall Grade:	2.89
Comments: The cats made the box spring a scratching post, he’s remodelled it into a chew toy.

           

Miscellaneous

	Trips to the vet	Grooming	Nail Trimming	Bathing	Crate Training
Calm	C	C	C	A	A
Quiet	A	A	A	A	A
Cooperative	A	A	C	A	A
Overall Grade					3.46

 

Cumulative GPA: 3.21

Closing remarks: Look at that personality! A little rough on some edges, but so so great! I got really lucky with my first dog. J

Name of Dog: Buster Brown

Owner:  Carissa

Age as of 8/1: 7.5 months

Gender: Male

Breed/breed mix: Black Lab Mix

Marking Period: Spring/Summer 2013

A – Outstanding (4.0)

B – Good (3.0)

C – Average (2.0)

D – I’m fantasizing about my dog with a new family on that hypothetical farm (1.0)

F – Honey, where's the shotgun?

N/A – Not applicable

(+/-) grades are acceptable

	GRADE
Sleep Habits
Through the night	A
Daytime naps	A
Sleep Overall Grade:	4.0
Comments:  Buster has no sleep issues.  Keep it up!
Food
Table Manners:
No Whining	F
No Stealing	F
No Begging	F
Sits still	F
Leaves people/children alone	F
Feeding:
Waits calmly	C
Eats when served	A
Doesn't inhale food like the world is about to end	B
Eats only dog food	D
Stays away from garbage/pantry/countertops/refrigerator/stove/oven	F
Food Overall Grade:	1.0
Comments:  This is one area that needs a lot of improvement.
Leash/Outdoor/Traveling Habits
Doesn't pull on leash	C
Walks straight	C
Heels	C
Handling distractions:
People:
Response:
Friendly but not overly	C
Non-aggressive	A
Non-fearful	A
Other dogs/animals:
Response:
Friendly but not overly	A
Non-aggressive	A
Non-fearful	A
Ignores:
Garbage	D
Scents	C
Cars	A
Inanimate objects	B
House training:
#1 outside	C
#2 outside	F
Expresses clearly the need to eliminate	C
Off Leash:
Stays near you	C
Comes when called	C
Ignores distractions	C
Car behaviour:
Calm/fear free	B
Stays in back	C
Stays still	D
Doesn’t distract driver	C
Maintains control of:
Drooling	A
Bowels	B
Urination	D
Regurgitation	F
Leash/Outdoor Habits Overall Grade:	2.37
Comments:  We have not done a great deal of leash work as of yet so his skills are hard to accurately assess.  The car rides are not that frequent either.  With more exposure I’m sure these areas will improve. He does need to stop pooping in the basement.  What is with that?
Personality
Friendly	A
Affectionate	A
Fun	A
Protective	D
Intelligent	B
Non-aggressive	B
Laidback	A
Submissive	B
Loyal	A
Social Skills:
With people	B
With children	A
With babies	A
With other dogs	A
With other pets	A
Play:
Enthusiastic	A
Successfully retrieves	A
Relinquishes toy without tug o’ war	B
Barking:
Stays quiet for:
Doorbell/Knocking	A
Unexpected noise	B
Indoor play	C
Outdoor play	A
Stops when corrected	B
Doggie etiquette:
No jumping	D
No pawing/scratching	C
No leg/object/other dog humping	D
No crotch sniffing	C
Respect for:
Boundaries	C
Common commands:
Sit	B
Stay	C
Lay down	C
Come	B
Give	B
Property:
Kids’ toys	D
Electronics	D
Clothing	A
Pillows/bedding/upholstery	A
Kitchenware	D
Important paper	A
Personality Overall Grade:	2.7
Comments:  Buster does not seem to understand which toys are his and which are the children’s.  All are fair game.  Maybe we should consider getting him his own Barbies. Also, the wire chewing is concerning as he is at risk of getting electrocuted.
Mouthing
Biting:
Abstains during:
Play with adults	C
Play with children	B
Walks	A
Greetings	A
Grooming	A
Quiet time/family time	B
Chewing:
Only treats provided	D
Abstains from:
Shoes	B
Furniture	A
Mouthing Overall Grade:	3.1
Comments:  This area has seen some improvement lately.  Keep it up!

           

Miscellaneous

	Trips to the vet	Grooming	Nail Trimming	Bathing	Crate Training
Calm	B	B	C	B	A
Quiet	B	B	B	B	B
Cooperative	B	B	C	B	A
Overall Grade					3.0

Cumulative GPA: 2.69

Closing remarks:

Overall, Buster is a good boy. He sweet and affectionate. He has some work to do on the house training, but I’m sure with a little effort he will get where he needs to be. He does need to work on his manners when it comes to food. His main issue is that he does not understand the difference between people food and dog food and feels he is entitled to any and all food in the house. This may be attributed to the rapid growth he is currently experiencing. With some more maturity I hope this will improve. The humping is thankfully limited to the other dog in the house, and she does not seem to mind so much, and in fact prefers it to the nipping. As long as that is kept to a minimum after he is neutered we can look the other way. 

Name of Dog:  Dottie Dawg

Owner:  Carissa

Age as of 8/1: 4 years?

Gender:  Female

Breed/breed mix: Some type of Hound and possibly Spaniel? or Boxer maybe?

Marking Period: Spring/Summer 2013

A – Outstanding (4.0)

B – Good (3.0)

C – Average (2.0)

D – I’m fantasizing about my dog with a new family on that hypothetical farm (1.0)

F – Honey, where's the shotgun?

N/A – Not applicable

(+/-) grades are acceptable

	GRADE
Sleep Habits
Through the night	A
Daytime naps	A
Sleep Overall Grade:	4.0
Comments:  Sleeping is one of Dottie's all time favorite pastimes.  She will stay asleep even if Dad gets up for work.
Food
Table Manners:
No Whining	A
No Stealing	C
No Begging	B
Sits still	A
Leaves people/children alone	B
Feeding:
Waits calmly	A
Eats when served	B
Doesn't inhale food like the world is about to end	A
Eats only dog food	C
Stays away from garbage/pantry/counter tops/refrigerator/stove/oven	B
Food Overall Grade:	3.2
Comments:  Having Buster has brought out some bad habits.  I'm convinced she is the brains behind some of Buster's food based shenanigans.
Leash/Outdoor/Traveling Habits
Doesn't pull on leash	B
Walks straight	B
Heels	B
Handling distractions:
People:
Response:
Friendly but not overly	B
Non-aggressive	A
Non-fearful	A
Other dogs/animals:
Response:
Friendly but not overly	C
Non-aggressive	C
Non-fearful	A
Ignores:
Garbage	B
Scents	B
Cars	A
Inanimate objects	B
House training:
#1 outside	A+
#2 outside	A+
Expresses clearly the need to eliminate	A
Off Leash:
Stays near you	A
Comes when called	A
Ignores distractions	B
Car behaviour:
Calm/fear free	C
Stays in back	C
Stays still	B
Doesn’t distract driver	C
Maintains control of:
Drooling	A
Bowels	A
Urination	A
Regurgitation	A
Leash/Outdoor Habits Overall Grade:	3.33
Comments:  Dottie came fully potty trained.  We lucked out.  I can count the number of accidents she has had on one hand.
Personality
Friendly	A
Affectionate	A
Fun	A
Protective	C
Intelligent	A
Non-aggressive	A
Laidback	A
Submissive	A
Loyal	A
Social Skills:
With people	A
With children	A
With babies	A
With other dogs	C
With other pets	A
Play:
Enthusiastic	B
Successfully retrieves	D
Relinquishes toy without tug o’ war	A
Barking:
Stays quiet for:
Doorbell	A
Unexpected noise	A
Indoor play	A
Outdoor play	C
Stops when corrected	A
Doggie etiquette:
No jumping	B
No pawing/scratching	B
No leg/object/other dog humping	A
No crotch sniffing	A
Respect for:
Boundaries	A
Common commands:
Sit	A
Stay	A
Lay down	B
Come	A
Give	A
Property:
Kids’ toys	A
Electronics	A
Clothing	A
Pillows/bedding/upholstery	A
Kitchenware	B
Important paper	A
Personality Overall Grade:	3.63
Comments: Dottie’s one weak area is retrieving. I think this is attributed to her breed and should not be seen as a personality flaw.
Mouthing
Biting:
Abstains during:
Play with adults	A
Play with children	A
Walks	A
Greetings	A
Grooming	A
Quiet time/family time	A
Chewing:
Only treats provided	A
Abstains from:
Shoes	A
Furniture	A
Mouthing Overall Grade:	4.0
Comments: Dottie has never been a biter or a chewer. Her only occasional slip happens to be wooden items, and I will attribute that to a desire to play with sticks.

           

Miscellaneous

	Trips to the vet	Grooming	Nail Trimming	Bathing	Crate Training
Calm	C	A	B	A	N/A
Quiet	A	A	A	A	N/A
Cooperative	B	B	B	A	N/A
Miscellaneous Overall Grade:					3.5

Cumulative GPA: 3.61

Closing remarks:

Dottie is a wonderful dog that came into our family as we lost our beloved 12 year old lab. She has done well with adjusting to the addition of the new puppy. She is slightly territorial and tends to bark at other dogs, however, never barks at people. She could channel this and be slightly more protective against strangers. 

Name of Dog: Heidi  

Owner: Alicia

Age as of 8/1: 5 months

Gender: Female

Breed/breed mix: Eastern German Shepherd

Marking Period: Spring/Summer 2013

A – Outstanding (4.0)

B – Good (3.0)

C – Average (2.0)

D – I’m fantasizing about my dog with a new family on that hypothetical farm (1.0)

F – Honey, where's the shotgun?

N/A – Not applicable

(+/-) grades are acceptable

	GRADE
Sleep Habits
Through the night	D
Daytime naps	C
Sleep Overall Grade:	1.5
Comments: Heidi was a terrible sleeper for a couple months. Poor bladder control would be understandable, so once a night was to be expected. But around 4:00 am, she’d cry after her walk until she was fed. We had to give in eventually (we’re only human) and feed her before sunrise which would necessitate another walk. Her grade would have been an F, but we changed her mealtimes to nine in the morning and nine at night and it solved the problem, more or less. She’s settled in to “C” behaviour – she starts whining and scratching between 6 and 7 am, goes back in her crate, and stays somewhat quiet until she’s let out at about 7:30.
Food
Table Manners:
No Whining	C
No Stealing	D
No Begging	C
Sits still	C
Leaves people/children alone	D
Feeding:
Waits calmly	D
Eats when served	A
Doesn't inhale food like the world is about to end	D
Eats only dog food	F
Stays away from garbage/pantry/countertops/refrigerator/stove/oven	C
Food Overall Grade:	1.6
Comments: Heidi will eat anything that fits in her mouth. Paper, garbage, leaves, rocks, Legos. Trust me on the Legos. They look the same when they come out. I do try to get non-food items out of her mouth, but she runs and has usually swallowed the item before I can dig it out. Everything so far has passed – lucky damn dog. She hasn’t figured out the garbage yet, but will steal food off an unattended counter or if you step away from the table. And she either whines while we eat if she’s crated or camps right under my 11-month-old’s highchair.
Leash/Outdoor/Traveling Habits
Doesn't pull on leash	D
Walks straight	D
Heels	D
Handling distractions:
People:
Response:
Friendly but not overly	C
Non-aggressive	C
Non-fearful	C
Other dogs/animals:
Response:
Friendly but not overly	D
Non-aggressive	D
Non-fearful	D
Ignores:
Garbage	D
Scents	C
Cars	B
Inanimate objects	D
House training:
#1 outside	C
#2 outside	B
Expresses clearly the need to eliminate	C
Off Leash:
Stays near you	C
Comes when called	C
Ignores distractions	C
Car behaviour:
Calm/fear free	B
Stays in back	B
Stays still	B
Doesn’t distract driver	B
Maintains control of:
Drooling	A
Bowels	A
Urination	C
Regurgitation	A
Leash/Outdoor/Traveling Habits Overall Grade:	2.07
Comments: Heidi has become territorial over her yard. She barks, pulls, and her fur stands up when she sees strangers or other animals. Her house training went as well as can be expected, but she does have “happy pee” when she’s overly excited. For walks, she’s afraid of her own shadow. It’s an excessive challenge when she becomes a dead weight every three steps. On long trips, we crate her in the car, and let her wander for short trips. So far there have been no major catastrophes.
Personality
Friendly	D
Affectionate	C
Fun	D
Protective	B
Intelligent	B
Non-aggressive	D
Laidback	D
Submissive	D
Loyal	B
Social Skills:
With people	C
With children	C
With babies	B
With other dogs	C
With other pets	N/A
Play:
Enthusiastic	B
Successfully retrieves	B
Relinquishes toy without tug o’ war	C
Barking:
Stays quiet for:
Doorbell	B
Unexpected noise	B
Indoor play	D
Outdoor play	B
Stops when corrected	D
Doggie etiquette:
No jumping	D
No pawing/scratching	D
No leg/object/other dog humping	B
No crotch sniffing	B
Respect for:
Boundaries	B
Common commands:
Sit	B
Stay	C
Lay down	B
Come	C
Give	B
Property:
Kids’ toys	C
Electronics	B
Clothing	D
Pillows/bedding/upholstery	B
Kitchenware	C
Important papers	D
Personality Overall Grade:	1.40
Comments: Heidi shows signs of being loyal and protective. Overall, though, she is very high strung. She loves us and is happy to see us when we return from an outing, but expresses that love with jumping, pawing, and biting. She only obeys commands when there is a treat involved, so not when it really matters. It has to be on her terms. For example, she’ll ignore/evade me when she is overly hyper and irritating people or when her play gets too aggressive.
Mouthing
Biting:
Abstains during:
Play with adults	F
Play with children	D
Walks	D
Greetings	F
Grooming	F
Quiet time/family time	F
Chewing:
Only treats provided	C
Abstains from:
Shoes	B
Furniture	B
Mouthing Overall Grade:	1.2
Comments: Heidi is more vampire than werewolf. The bite marks and scratches never get a chance to heal before new ones take their place. I can’t put her leash on without her gnawing on my arm. She’s also punctured the back of my thigh while I was holding the baby. During play, her teeth always seem to wander to my hand and arm despite my refusal to play the game her way. She bites to get attention and bites when she has attention. Then when your grab for her to correct the behaviour (a time out in her crate), she plays an annoying game of “try to catch me.” And most times, she’d rather bite than get affection. It’s sad when there are plenty of people in my house willing to pet her and play with her. Her only redeeming quality is that she seems to understand “baby,” but she doesn’t hesitate to bite my five-year old and seven-year old. During grooming, her biting gets vicious. Nail clipping takes two adults and we still end up with bites and scratches. We’ve avoided giving her a bath. Her behaviour is equally as bad. The best we can do is hose her down from a distance.

           

Miscellaneous

	Trips to the vet	Grooming	Nail Trimming	Bathing	Crate Training
Calm	C	D	F	F	C
Quiet	C	D	F	F	C
Cooperative	C	D	F	F	C
Miscellaneous Overall Grade					1.0

Cumulative GPA: 1.46

Closing remarks:

Heidi, you’re a terror, but I’m not a quitter. You’re lucky I’m as stubborn as you are.

Stay tuned for my next blog post, “My Positive Reinforcement Woes.” Heidi has issues and we’ve attempted to deal with them by going to an expert. Let’s see if there’s hope for me and my puppy delinquent…

What is with this Common Core?

     I'm currently working on my Masters Degree in Education.  Basically for the past year, every single book that I have read has the words "The Common Core" in the title.  Does this make me an expert?  I don't know about that, but I know that I know more than the average parent.
     So what is "The Common Core"?  Basically is is a set of guidelines that teachers are supposed to follow.  What a lot of people don't realize is that the Common Core is very general.  Some examples of the standards are compare and contrast, determine cause and effect, cite textual evidence. I do think these are legitimate skills that any student should have.
      As a teacher, you can compare and contrast just about anything.  Skittles and M&Ms, mushrooms and ferns, Ford and GM, Classical and Romantic composers, Spanish and Portuguese, it really doesn't matter as long as your students acquire the skill.  Citing textual evidence can be citing fashion blogs.   There is a high degree of flexibility within the core.
     The test results though, they are problematic.  The NYS scores that were released show that only 31% of all students meet or exceed expectations.  The news gets worse if the child is a minority or does not speak English as their maternal language or is a minority or has a disability.  Only 3.2% of ELLs (English Language Learners) met expectations, only 5% of students with disabilities and if the student is Black or Hispanic, about 16%.  
     The 2nd grade questions that asked kids to differentiate between cuneiform and hieroglyphics are brought forth to point out the facetiousness of the testing ordeal.  While I do agree that question is ridiculous, I do not think that the Common Core is a bad thing.  The validity of the assessments are the issue, not the core itself.  To throw out the core entirely would be to throw out the baby with the bath water.
   
     More states are coming on line with the common core for the 2013-2014 school year, so stay tuned.  I do think New York may have been a good state to start with, as we do have a tradition for rigorous education and accountability via test score.  The Regents exams have been a long standing tradition within the state.    
   

The Twinados

     There is a new sci-fi phenomenon called Sharknado.  I haven't actually seen the movie, but I would venture to bet my twins are far more destructive.  They have earned their nicknames, The Twinados and Los Terramotitos, which in Spanish means the little earth quakes.
    People have said that I should write a parenting book.  I'm not sure that I'm the best role model, however, I provide my Facebook Friends with much amusement.  As time goes by, I would have thought that the destruction would ebb, but no.  Half of these were from the past 6 months.

"What I thought was a blue-green algae problem in our aquarium turned out to be 2 markers thrown into the tank by a certain 4 year old little boy."

I had put my children to bed. After an hour or so passed, MJ just walked into my bedroom covered in honey. HONEY of all things. I can't make this stuff up. Why did they have honey in their room? Maybe a Pooh homage? Or a reenactment of a scene from the "Parent Trap".

Once upon a time on a very snowy day, a certain little boy made it snow inside the house.

I can't walk yet, but I can sure climb, especially if cookies are involved.

They won't miss just a couple of grapes. 

I bought the Gyro bowls in hopes that less food would find it's way onto the floor.
Final Score:

Twinadoes - 57

Gyro Bowl - 1

We were coloring before nap time.  After I put the twins down, I noticed several markers were gone.  I looked under the table, then under the radiators, finding absolutely nothing.  Then when they woke up I found this.  My daughter had stuck a number of markers into her jammies to smuggle them up to her room, like a prisoner at Shawshank would smuggle contraband. 

                                              

Guys, Mommy needs those for the lesson she is teaching tomorrow . . . okay just one more each.  No, no more. Sigh I give up, I'll just stop at the store on the way to school.  

I try to be the fun mom.  Really I do.  I so wanted to get a ginormous pumpkin and take a picture of one of them sitting inside it.  This was all I got.  

This was our only shot to get pictures of our kids on a card.

Antonio: OMG get me down
Aurora: is he really Santa?
Mariella: SHH it's Santa

Antonio: Where's my blankie?
Aurora: Zhuzhu pets, Legos, leap pad and and . . .
Mariella: Relax Toto

Antonio: Thank you mommy, about that blankie, daddy?
Aurora: Santa don't forget, Barbie
Mariella: can I have a cookie now?

As I stood in line at Time Warner Cable to exchange this remote, the twins were all over the place.  I could barely keep a straight face as I told the clerk "It just suddenly stopped working." 

This is an entire bottle of shampoo.  It gives new meaning to the phrase "carpet shampoo".

Stuck.

This also was the work of the twinados.

But then they are so good sometimes, people think I'm crazy. Don't let this picture fool you.

Birth Order, Family Dynamics, and Why Middle Children Rock!

Birth order matters, right? Researchers don't necessarily agree, but conclusive data or not, we are who we are because of our families. First, second, third-born, twins, large family, small family? Each case has its own set of challenges. Just ask your parents or other moms/dads at the playground. They’ll have plenty of anecdotal evidence to suggest family dynamics are a big win in the "nurture" category.

There are no hard and fast rules. That's what throws off those poor souls who try to come up with trends backed by numbers. For every rule, there's a rule breaker. But as a proud middle child and a mother of three, I've made up my own rules. I'll let you decide if they're true.

Oldest children are often competitive achievers. They like attention, praise, and control. They are opinionated and mature for their age. In my family, my older sister (Yes, Carissa, I'm going to drag you into this), liked to "direct" and took charge of play–you stand here, wear this, say this, hold this–and I, for the most part, didn't mind. But there was a lot of conflict between her and my mother (also an oldest child). I see some of the same trends in my current household. I sometimes have to scold my oldest for being too “bossy,” and of course, he argues.

Middle children are amiable peacekeepers. We're the "people pleasers." During intense discussions, we make light of the situation with jokes and sarcasm, and if that doesn't resolve the conflict, we get upset and withdraw. We sometimes get mistaken as “shy,” but really we're cautious listeners who don't like to offend anyone. We're used to being ignored. We're usually OK with that, and if not, we work harder. If no one notices an accomplishment, then it wasn't good enough. In some families, this mentality can be dangerous or self-destructive. If middle children can’t be the smartest, most athletic, most talented, etc., they might settle for any attention they can get.

Youngest children are fun-loving free spirits. They are simple, adventurous, independent, and the least likely to accept adulthood. Some might even seem like self-centered rebels, but in my sister's case, (Sorry Eileen, you're not off the hook either) she has a good sense of "self" and doesn't succumb to societal norms. She does what she pleases and that happens to be helping others. She is altruistic, conscientious, prudent, and wise. She learns from her mistakes and the mistakes of others. She never wanted to follow in her sisters' footsteps. All things considered, she's probably happier that way...and better off.

Now that I have a family of my own, I might pull less of my hair out if I consider my own experiences and accept the inevitable. For example, my oldest son will always think he knows everything. I will have to adapt to "keep the peace" because he, in all likelihood, never will. I’ll also have to keep in mind that I have a mixed-gender family. I need to be patient, flexible, and tolerant of all personalities, but I've been doing this all my life. It's not easy, and my exasperation is usually internalized, but I'll make do. That's why middle children rock! And this leads me to the purpose of this post...

It's a busy time of year and I had an "oh crap" moment when I realized my middle child is graduating from preschool. How did THAT come up so fast!? We'll squeeze it in between baseball games and teacher’s conferences, baby naps and feeding schedules, and incessant puppy-dog walks. He won't be the center of the universe, though, and he'll understand. That's why he's "my bear."

So this post is for you, Jake-a-doo…

You get hand-me-downs and don't complain. Your brother's favorite shirt is now your favorite shirt, and the grease stains give it personality.

Your brother’s old shoes are practically bare to the sole. But you're happy they don't hurt like new.

You never had your own room. But you appreciate the company.

You hold the remote as infrequently as your mother does. You usually watch what someone else has selected, or you find another diversion.

You have to watch your brother's sporting events because you’re too young to play. And you're content to sit there with a candy bar and a soda.

You sit in the backseat and don't ask questions. Where are we going? What are we doing? Why are we stopped? How long will it take? How fast are we going? Look here… Look there…

You make PLENTY of mistakes. But you’re usually SO remorseful, it’s hard to stay angry.

You're happy with any restaurant that serves a hotdog and spicy chicken (hot wings). You don’t sulk if the menu is less than satisfactory.

You don't get a lot of one-on-one mommy time. But you make the most of it and enjoy your independence.

During the morning crazies, I sometimes forget your breakfast. An hour (or more) later, you politely say, "Mom, I'm still hungry."

You're always compared to your other siblings. But you find a way to be unique even if no one seems to be paying attention.

In other words, Jacob, thanks for being easy going, for occasionally sleeping past 7:30, for making me laugh, for not understanding the meaning of jealousy, for the big blue-eyed smiles, and all the dandelions...